The Top 5 Worst Movies Ever Made

WARNING: This hub may cause nausea, vomiting, headaches, excessive crying, outbreaks of acne, and you’re skin turning inside out (maybe not that). Do not read if you’re pregnant or taking any kind of medication. You’ve been warned. If you’re reading this right now, then prepare yourself for some excruciating pain and agony. You’re about to read about five of the worst movies that have ever been made.

So if you decided to take over the world, what would you be? Something that’s all powerful right? Well for Dr. Z, it’s becoming a giant fish. I’m pretty sure the universe can handle this problem. The first 15 minutes is LITERALLY the credits and this Dr. Z wondering around aimlessly back to his laboratory to turn himself into this giant fish. They seriously could’ve edit out 14 minutes this. When he takes off his clothes, one side of his underwear is up higher then the other side. He then transforms into this giant fish, and then, well takes over the universe in some town. That’s really all you need to know.

Oh man. No. Just no. No, no, no, no, no, NO, NO, NO, NO. There was four different things going on here in this movie along with no plot. What in the hell were the people that approved of this movie thinking? And the beginning of the movie was taken from another movie! They don’t connect. So basically, there’s a group of men hunting for deer, while there was this rock group that was going camping, and this family that lived in the woods, along with this alien named Trumpy. If you’re confused with my writing right now, YOU SHOULD BE. I had no idea what was going on in this movie. They must have been operating on a one hour day because it was always day or night in the next scene, along with an obnoxious amount fog outside in the woods. Then, somebody is always dying and then it’s, “Well, who wants breakfast?” That’s the other thing, even though it was rapidly day and night through the entire movie, it was always time for breakfast. Sorry for the lack of class, but WTF? The other thing is most of the movie took place at this one house, but this house was like a house in a house. It was like twenty houses in one and I’m not exaggerating. Who designed this house? Who made this movie?

More like Ring of just plain awful. The only thing terrifying about this movie was the plot or the lack there of. The other thing that was terrifying was the forty and fifty year old college students that look like they need walkers or canes. The movie tries to be like a longer episode of Twilight Zone, but of course it goes terribly wrong. In the beginning, the mortician is giving the introduction and then goes looking for his cat Puma. Suddenly, he steps on the cat and it runs away. THE SEARCHING OF THE CAT GOES ON FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES! There was no reason for that to be in the movie at all. After 10 minutes, you finally find out who the story is about after he finds the cat at his grave. Then, the terrifying pain of this movie continues...

Okay, there’s awful and then there’s REALLY AWFUL. So apparently, this space capsule crashes and the astronaut is missing. There’s this monster out on the loose and it’s suppose to tie in with the lost astronaut. There’s an investigation throughout the entire movie of FINDING NOTHING along with a pointless dancing scene. Then in the end, you find out that the monster doesn’t even exist after seeing it only twice the entire movie and they’re like “What do you think?” I don’t think I’ve even been in this much pain watching a movie. I even watched the Mystery Science Theater 3000 version and the pain still didn’t subside! Even the guys on the show admitted that it was the worst movie they’d ever seen, and they were having a hard time coming up with stuff because it was so bad.

At this point, I didn’t think it could get any worse. Well, what do you know? IT DOES. A fertilizer salesman created this academy award winner of a bad film. You want the plot? A family gets lost, comes across this hotel that’s taken care by a guy with GIGANTIC THIGHS named Torgo. He worships “The Master” that worships “Manos.” The robe he wears has GIANT HANDS...... I’m sorry I can’t write anymore. It’s just painful to think about. All you need to know is bad acting, bad editing, and apparently the worst movie of all time.